"Can I stay at the apartment?"
I chuckle a bit. "Mitch, didn't you leave here on your own?"
"Yeah."
"Did I kick you out?"
"No, I left on my own."
"You went to your cousin's place, knowing that you going there would ruin any chances of even being cordial with each other! Why can't she offer you a place to stay?"
"Well, Yolande, you're being unfair!"
"Wait a minute-am I being unfair when I ask you not to associate with someone who had no problem assaulting me when I was pregnant? Am I unfair when I ask you to respect me enough, not to fucking want to hang out all the time with her and dare defend her actions when there's nothing to defend? NOT to mention she was responsible for trying to get her siblings to pressure their mom to put us out on the streets when we had nowhere to go you're obviously ignoring that if you still want to spend time with her."" Please, I think we need to get better at communicating with each other. We gotta work this out!"
"You knew that hanging out with her, was going to lead to this. I told you, repeatedly that if you went over there I no longer want to do anything with you. Knowing that you would ruin your relationship with me you left, so don't think you can manipulate me."
"I'm tired of arguing and I don't want to answer your questions anymore."
"Yet you want to come and stay here? Things can't always go your way Mitch because they have been this whole time. You're the most passive aggressive person I have ever met, you never want to communicate, so I have to ask you a million question to ever get an answer out of you. Why do you think I want to live in this kind of environment? I'm tired of being the 'bad guy' here. YOUR cousin is the one who assaulted us in Kelowna, didn't she?"
This is where he reverts to his angry four year old self.
"She-didn't-assault-you."
"Why are you defending her? You left here because you would rather be over at her place why don't you stay over at her place?"
"She's busy."
"Ooh well she just cost you a wife and kid she better offer you a place to stay"
"I can't stay here."
"So I'm the bad guy, I'm the one who's being unfair now. My point is not valid."
"Your point is valid."
"But she didn't do anything wrong. Why are you defending her?"
This is where he stops talking. After a few more question I tell him to have a good life and hang up.
Kudos to him for defending a family member.
But his chivalry is wasted on that...unpleasant...person. This is the family member he admitted having inappropriate feelings for...then recanted that confession, claiming I FORCED him to say those things. When that same family member has repeatedly attacked me and left angry phone messages and created drama with her mother for helping my daughter and he would rather side with her than be his daughter's provider, protector and father and he's sticking up for her and trying to guilt trip me into letting him stay over here, with Lilo and I, he can go kiss my ass.
His lack of logic is beyond ridiculous. If his idea of communication and working together involves him getting his way at all time then I don't need to be dealing with him. I would like to get my way some fucking time to. Hell. It's about time I start being unreasonable. His family has PLENTY of funds to buy him a place to stay here in Calgary. Not to mention, if I'm so unreasonable, unfair, antisocial, angry and unpleasant, why does he keep wanting to come back here?
They want him in Kelowna so they can keep him under their loving thumb and he knows that.
If he wants me to cooperate he's doing it wrong. I'm tired of bending over backwards for someone who has no regards for me, what-so-fucking ever.
It's give and take. Not give give give give while he takes takes takes takes and tells every one he knows that he hates my ass and he wants a divorce (he was doing this last year behind my back) and him using your mental health as leverage to avoid any situation which might require you to display any level of maturity is just beyond sad.
When I first met him and his family, I was more than open to whatever, wherever our relationship was heading.
They're the ones who felt they could look down their nose at me. I think they made the mistake of thinking I gave a fuck about their approval. Now he wants to say I'm the controlling one?
Oh the Irony.
I will surround myself with people who act right. If you don't, exit left. Period.
This world is filled with enough people who wish others harm. I don't need to be living with one, or even one who chooses to associate himself with people who have behaved inappropriately towards me. And again am I not unfair? Controlling? Imposing rules that would keep him from his beloved family members? Oh Woe Woe Woe!!! I'm the bitter Foreign Bitch who knows nothing of his civilized ways. Up here, you don't get angry, you get passive aggressive. And defending yourself is a no-no.
Clearly I didn't get the memo.
Did I mention he hung up on me twice in the middle of that convo? SMH.
I did not get in this relationship to be a doormat, Mitch. I'm a very reasonable person. And I don't fight unless I'm provoked. You, good sir, provoked me the day you decided to treat me and your then unborn daughter with less respect that we deserved. It's time for Lilo to have a normal, stable life. It's not gonna happen with a coward like you as a father. If you can't stand up to your family, then stay THEIR doormat.
Don't involve us in this mess.
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