Some say I have a wild imagination. Others consider it selfishness. I'm thinking it's more like a little bit of heartbreak with a hint of delerium. But this is where all the fun begins. A seed of love was in my palm when Sue gave me that call. Ace of cups. Love. I'm all about sharing my cup with everyone. It's a cosmic gamble. Someone's going to have to share it with me now. I'm also liberating all the kinks I've got in terms of all my love relationships. And I have a lot of emotional blockage backing up lately. So this call for a complete restructuring of my life. I'm getting back to the city in a couple of months. Until then I have no car, will make no commitments to anyone and I will focus on making that goal manifest itself. When Lilo and I get back to the city, I have a feeling we could be taking advantage of a better landscape than this one. Convenience all around, why constrict myself and limit my own creative process by doing all of this penance bullshit?
It's only for the guilty mind and I've decided I'm free of guilt. Anyone's guilt. The constrictions added on exponentially and it all culminated into my car breaking down and now after some New Moon Magic I'm deciding that my life needs to, again, be completely discombobulated and broken down, this time however into manageable pieces that all cater to my child and I's inner gardens flourishing.
So moving to Nelson is going to take a while to reconcile within myself. I don't want to leave the Valley. I will do whatever I have to do to maintain the 'art and parenting is my only occupation' schtick until she's old enough to go to school. The amount of work I put into this goal will determine the outcome so I have to maximize the amount of time I put into work as an artist in order to get somewhere as an artist.
There are many ways of making that happen. I could get a landscaping job which would keep my pecs in shape or I could rely on my co-dependent benefactor, which...you know what my choice is going to be. Government checks and community gardening. Pentacles fall out of my pockets daily because I have no attachment to it. There's abundance around me. I can make shit happen. I can't deny it to myself anymore, Lilo and I are having some serious dietary issues and our nutrition plan needs some serious overhauling. Lilo wants her daddy and nana and I need to find a balanced way to make that happen. Our emotional lives are in shambles and it's time to hold some folks accountable. I'm going to need some time to put my life back together and you know, while all of that's happening, I want a man in my pants.
So come on Universe, I'm the Magician and you my Play-doh.
It's only for the guilty mind and I've decided I'm free of guilt. Anyone's guilt. The constrictions added on exponentially and it all culminated into my car breaking down and now after some New Moon Magic I'm deciding that my life needs to, again, be completely discombobulated and broken down, this time however into manageable pieces that all cater to my child and I's inner gardens flourishing.
So moving to Nelson is going to take a while to reconcile within myself. I don't want to leave the Valley. I will do whatever I have to do to maintain the 'art and parenting is my only occupation' schtick until she's old enough to go to school. The amount of work I put into this goal will determine the outcome so I have to maximize the amount of time I put into work as an artist in order to get somewhere as an artist.
There are many ways of making that happen. I could get a landscaping job which would keep my pecs in shape or I could rely on my co-dependent benefactor, which...you know what my choice is going to be. Government checks and community gardening. Pentacles fall out of my pockets daily because I have no attachment to it. There's abundance around me. I can make shit happen. I can't deny it to myself anymore, Lilo and I are having some serious dietary issues and our nutrition plan needs some serious overhauling. Lilo wants her daddy and nana and I need to find a balanced way to make that happen. Our emotional lives are in shambles and it's time to hold some folks accountable. I'm going to need some time to put my life back together and you know, while all of that's happening, I want a man in my pants.
So come on Universe, I'm the Magician and you my Play-doh.
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